Sunday July Twenty Eighth Two Thousand Thirteen

Mom,

I send you the most love imaginable with the purist of wishes that this letter comforts you in the ways I wish I could.

I want to first apologize for writing that letter to you. It's just living like this isn't easy everyday. I try to tell myself it's going to be okay when it isn't but that don't mean to take it out on you. So how are you doing? How have you been? Are you working? If so, that's good. Tell Grandma I love her and miss her.

As for me, I've been decent. Brandee came to visit me with Neveah which was the best ever although her Mom (Martha) kept pushing to leave which kinda made me mad, but I can't blame her.

You know as short as the letter/cards are that you send me they happen to be the most heart warming of all! You know its hard to imagine what you truely feel but honestly I admire how strong you are, cuz I know for a fact it ain't easy being the mom of a failure. Not only have I let you down but I let all of you down including my daughter.

One of the hardest things I've ever done was Forgive not only you for having to make decisions you thought were the best and maybe weren't but myself as well. And I did it recently. As much as you didn't know how to be a mom. I don't know how to be a dad. All the times you felt like giving up, I feel those now. But little do we know that When we give up today, we give up tomorrow, when we need to give up the past and move forward. So this is it, me giving up the past.....I'm sorry please forgive me as God has and continues.

Being little I never did learn how to be a man, but now I know a part of being a man is admitting your faults,
accepting responsibility and moving on and I learned that from being here.  I don't think you'll ever believe me but I don't expect you too.

So I go to court on the 1st and trial Aug. 26th. I hope to hear from you before trial. An actual written letter would be nice. But as for now I'm at a loss for words.

Well I love you and take care.

Sincerely your son,
Taylor O.